Not being able to meet the desired outcome or objective is what we generalize as a failure. If we were to list the situations that can attribute to it, it may run to many pages. One can fail at school, work, home, in life, in sports and so on. The most important factor is the way a person reacts to failure and how he/she picks up the pieces.
Failure is hard and sometimes it can drive people to depression. Recognize it and you can recast it into a success.
Reaction to failure
In failure, the worst enemy is our ego. When things go wrong, our defence mechanisms begin to kick in and we would do anything to save our face. These are generally normal reactions we exhibit - denial, depression, hedonic editing all of that definitely causes mayhem on our ability to adapt. We always try to convince ourselves, that it is ok to fail and mistakes happen. When it comes to career, we make mistakes that are costly. Sometimes, we may lose our jobs. We can fail in relationships too. Often, it may not even be our fault but we blame ourselves. We can definitely evaluate the situation and experiment a different approach. We may not be sure if this new approach will work or sink. Yet it can be stepping stones to success, as they say. Trial and error has always been the order of life.
Try new things by exposing yourself to different ideas and accept when you have failed. Recognizing it may be the hardest part. We might have tried persistently for success and sometimes it eludes us. The stronger the trial, the better the success if we can look into what has gone wrong. For example, in college some students may be hard working, yet fail whereas a student who studies less may top. By identifying where we are going wrong and working on that issue can help us succeed. Maybe our approach to the particular subject was not the right one. College is an incredible safe space to fail. We are experimenting with a new city, new ideas and even friends. We can mess socially and academically but as long as we mess up safe limits and learn our lessons we can move on.
Gather feedback and try to see which experiments were right and where you have gone wrong. Work on a plan but don’t become too attached or emotional or obsessed. It is good to have a plan to make a success but if it becomes an obsession, then you may become a failure again.
Explore new ideas and try and weed out ideas that did not work. When working on a success plan give little room for failure. That way you will be doubly careful. Just like in any firm non-profits is a way to work for profits, in life failure is a way to succeed.
Many times failures have led to severe depression and people have committed suicide. It could be because of pressure from home or family. We all fail and it is left to the family to lend a moral support to any member who may have failed in career, academics or any other performance. Instead of nagging the person it is good to encourage him and tell him that there are always better alternatives.
We can fail in relationships too, when two people are not compatible. Sometimes, we are attracted for the wrong reason and when things go wrong one of the partners are hurt and depressed. In this case, one should realize that it has been for the best and you can always pick up on the failures of this relationship and work it out better.
Extreme depression due to this however, needs counselling. Otherwise it can lead to suicidal tendencies. Sometimes, the person becomes an introvert and does not want to face anybody.
Give yourself full freedom to test new ideas and experiments and off the wall ides when trying to cope with failure. Do not hesitate to discuss with peers since they may have a solution for you. As long as you do not feel ashamed when you fail, you can always succeed.