Make Your Own Character

When people tell you to make your own character as a teenager, it can be hard to know what they are expecting. People use character to mean a whole variety of things but overall if someone is described as having character, it is used in a positive sense to mean that they have something special that makes them stand out from the crowd.

As a self-improvement activity, improving personal character types consists of two parts. First, you need to make changes yourself and second you need other people to notice those changes.

Good Character Defined


Before you can start thinking about how to make your own character, you need to have an idea as to what you want the result to look like. To do this, you need to have a good soul searching session about your current attitudes and behaviors. You could start by making a list of character traits that you admire, that you want to keep and that you want change or develop. Good character traits should include the Six Pillars of Character as well as:

  • Making the right choice – Your beliefs in right and wrong guide your actions. Are you able to make the right decisions even when faced by temptation to take revenge on someone else? Are you able to think about the long-term consequences of your actions and words when you are dealing with people?
  • Being unselfish – True unselfishness is almost impossible to find, but working at it will help you to make your own character better. Doing charity work and volunteering will go a long way to foster this trait. However, you can also do it on a personal basis by offering to help your family do certain chores or taking on someone’s extra cases at work.
  • Being dependable – A large part of having a good character is doing right by other people. If other people can count on you to follow through on your promises and to be there in times of need, you will find them changing their attitude towards you. This in turn will help to build your self-esteem, making you want to be even more dependable in the future.

Can a Leopard Change its Spots?

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One of the quotes about character is from the story of the leopard, which once it develops its distinctive features cannot change them. People use the analogy when talking about someone’s character as a means of showing that once a person has certain character traits, it is hard to change them. However, once you make your own character, it is still possible to make changes.

What is much harder is to get people to notice you making those changes. If you try to become more unselfish, but those around are so used to your selfish ways that they do not recognize your efforts, it does not feel very rewarding to make these changes. Follow these tips to get the people around you to help you make big character changes:

  • Show them - Simply doing something nice for family and friends, or changing how you react in certain situations might not be enough to convince them you are changing, especially not in the short term. If you sit them down and tell them that you are ready to turn over a new leaf, they still may doubt you. However, when you combine the telling by being consistent in being the new you, that will show them that you have indeed changed.
  • Be consistent – Just because people are not falling over themselves to thank you when you take the high road in a situation where you would usually take the lowest road possible, it does not mean they do not see it. If you have a lot of history of poor character traits, it may take a while to get those around you to take your effort seriously to make your own character better. You have to be consistent with your changes and soon people will notice.
  • One step at a time - When you make your lists, you may feel slightly overwhelmed at the list of traits you want to change. You should aim instead to change one thing at a time, making sure that it has become a permanent part of your lifestyle before moving to the next challenge.

Before claiming defamation of character, which is an unfounded attack on your character, do a self-analysis to determine if any truth is present in the allegations. Choosing to make your own character better is the first step to disprove such claims and will go a long way to making you a better person

Ways to Change Your Character

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