The Letting Go

The letting go of anything can be a rather difficult and traumatic process. The range of emotions we often need to cope with in these situations are many. Some of the most common things that we sometimes have to release from our lives are:

  • Relationships: Even the best relationship may become a painful one and one to which you will need to say goodbye.
  • Anger: This emotion can make it difficult to behave rationally and to see clearly, what the right solutions to situations we encounter are. Releasing pent up anger is usually the first step in any healing process.
  • Disappointment with Life/Achievements: Feeling that one has not lived up to one’s potential is a strong emotion that can lead to sorrow and depression. It is often necessary to learn from failures and to strive to be better at the things you are good at doing.
  • Personal possessions: The desire to hold on to things that have special memories is a powerful one. It can sometimes prevent us from truly moving forward, especially after a loss.

Many people see the signs long before they take action. Some refuse to acknowledge that there are benefits to the letting go of things that may hold them back emotionally. Long-term happiness is the ultimate goal, and learning to let go may mean better health and a simpler way of life.

You could feel tied to someone or find yourself fighting desperately to pay the maintenance bill for an old house. Whatever the signs are, you should examine them to find out how to improve things. Sometimes the only way to make things better is to find closure.

Learning What to Do and How to Let Go

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It is a part of human nature to find comfort in the familiar. Unfortunately, change is also a natural part of life and sometimes change requires the letting go of something or someone dear to us. The steps in moving forward do not work equally well for everyone. It may happen in a few weeks for some and may take years for others, but the most important thing is doing what is necessary to move on.

Some steps in this process include:

  • Acceptance: Accept that things have to change and this means letting go of the thing or person that is the issue. It may be the realization that you have to sell the old family home with all its memories in order to get a more affordable one. This is one of the most important, if not the most important step in the process.
  • Commitment: You have to want to move forward and let go. Unless you work towards letting go and moving towards the future confidently and without the pain of loss, you will never succeed.
  • Forgiving: This emotion plays an important role in getting go and moving on. Holding on to anger and bitterness over a breakup for example gives the situation power over you.
  • Meditating and Breathing: For many people being able to find quiet time with their thoughts works wonders during the process of healing. It allows them to evaluate the situation and arrive at a conclusion that is best for them or sometimes others who are part of the situation.

Some persons turn to motivational quotes about loss and starting over to help them deal with the pain of the letting go process. Steve Maraboli, the author of Life, The Truth and Being Free has a beautiful quote about letting go, which states, “The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that that situation is over, you cannot move forward.

When it comes to the letting go decision, grieving is natural and it is fine to do so. However, the grieving process cannot or should not be everlasting. Cry if you feel the urge especially since crying helps to release stress, which can result in physical and mental problems. Finding time to do the things you love will help you deal with the pain and longing. Learn to laugh again by reading a funny book or watching your favorite comedian.

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